crazy week

this week has been crazy busy, it's one of those weird busy feelings after a long day and you feel really tired and you know you did a lot but you can't even process because you haven't had time. It's a very satisfying feel at the same time though now that I do have time to think, I have gotten to talk to people I haven't seen in literally years, start to fix a bad relationship with an adult who I have always just been weird with, I'm almost finished with Irresistible Revolution which is still amazing and challenging, applied to volunteer at the Oliver Gospel Mission, started a life group with the guys in my house and a few other awesome dudes and I'm very excited, and I'm spent some incredible time with Jesus.

I've truly realized how much it affects me when I don't read about, pray to, and walk with Jesus. Last week I started getting back on track after going several days and it was ridiculous to see how much temptation was in my life to be lazy and sin, and how far I can feel from God if I'm not spending time with him. I love my quiet times though. I admit I can be very random during them. Lately I've started to make to-do lists which are very very helpful. If I'm praying and feel like there is someone I need to talk to, something I should do, or just forgot some random chore I have a list handy to just write it down and continue. I also admit that it makes life way more difficult. I'm constantly struggling with having deeper relationships, being challenged more by Jesus, and to love even when I don't want to at all. It's scary too, to know what God is asking you to do when it's the last thing you want to do. Or even scarier when you don't know the next step and you have to figure it out yourself.

I do love it though and I'm very excited about what is in store. I finally am stepping out and getting involved with homeless ministry, I feel like Jesus talks a lot about especially here in terms of going and loving on "the least of these" and I am trying to take him very literally. Sunday at Finlay park there is a ministry called "Food Not Bombs" which is a pot luck lunch at 1pm for the homeless, you just show up with a dish (i will be cooking peanut butter and jelly sandwiches) and people come and eat. The most exciting part to me though is the people I will meet. I just pray that somehow I can show that these people are cared for and that God loves them more than they could ever understand instead of seeing "Homo Sex is A Threat to National Security" signs or "Jews Blacks Gays and Sinners will burn in Hell" t-shirts on our street corners by people who aren't spending their time to charge the gates of hell themselves.